I’m not much for exercise.  I have very little self-discipline and tend to avoid things that demand effort or cause discomfort.  The home gym in my basement sees more use as a clothesline for the shirts waiting to be ironed than as a machine for building muscles.  I’ve learned that in order to stay in something resembling good shape, I have to trick myself into exercising.  So last year, I started taking long walks at night.  Not for exercise, of course, but rather to take time alone to listen to my ipod and think.

One of the first things that struck me on these walks was how peaceful and calm our city is at night.  I can walk for over an hour and not pass a soul.  Sometimes I won’t even see a car passing by.  Most times I feel like the only person on earth.  It makes me wonder what people in this town do with their evenings, especially on the really magical nights.

Last night was just such a night.  It was cold, but calm.  We’ve had a few days of fog, and the resulting hoarfrost has made the whole landscape look as though it had been heavily dusted with icing sugar.  The street lamps gave everything a sparkle and a glow.  I followed my usual route and came to a park that looked like something out of The Chronicles of Narnia.  The kind of moment that makes your soul ache.

I continued on through the empty streets and playgrounds feeling both a sense of awe and outrage.  Awe at what I perceived to be the delicate handiwork of a great artist, and outrage that this magnificent work of art was going unnoticed and unappreciated.  Most folks were likely too enthralled by 42″ of Liquid Crystal to be bothered with suiting-up to brave the elements and engage this wonder on it’s own terms.  So there it sat.  Like an extravagant art showing that no one bothered to attend. Like a candlelight dinner going cold, waiting for a spouse who is running late.  Like an Easter Egg lying in the grass, waiting to be stumbled upon.

To be fair, I spend my fair share of nights in front of the TV too, but not last night.  It’s a shame that so much beauty seems to go to waste.  Or maybe it’s extravagance.  In which case, I think it speaks something about the author of our universe, and that is a point of particular comfort to me.  The more I try to take note of the world around me, the more I begin to see God as an artist, rather than an economist.

Lately, many people I know have begun to question and even walk away from belief in God.  I can’t blame them.  Our world is a mess, and what’s worse, the God most of us have been offered is the God whom Modernity has fashioned in its own image.  The modern God must be productive and efficient, if He is to be any kind of God at all.  He must rid the world of pain, put all the “bad guys” under a rock, and hang a neon sign in the sky pointing to Himself.  Since the world we observe is full of tragedy and what appears to be wastefulness, we reason that there is no accountant God.  If this was the only available image of God, I too would abandon the idea of God for something (or nothing) else.

But, a universe without God leads to all sorts of absurdities.  I’m not saying atheism is absurd.  Atheism makes perfect sense to me.  What I am saying is that a universe without God would be an absurd place.  For one thing, there would be no basis for the objective moral values and duties we apprehend.  (You do not have to believe in God to be a moral person.  That’s not what I’m saying.  I know many atheists who live lives that are morally exemplary.  What I do mean is that the moral values we all perceive, whether we believe in God or not, make for convincing evidence of God’s existence.)

Also, a universe that simply “is” would be one in which our lives have no reason or purpose aside from what we assign ourselves.  Sadly, this meaning would be nothing more than self-deception.  In the face of a meaningless universe, one would need to knowingly deceive one’s self, in spite of the truth.  Now I grant, it’s possible that, as a Christian, I am the one who has been deceived.  Although I’ve tried to base my conclusions about my faith on logic and good evidence, it’s possible that I may have miss-interpreted that evidence, or worse yet, someone else may have deceived me by planting false evidence.  Even if that were true, this kind of deception would be of a far more innocent sort since I would be its unwitting victim.  The earlier deception is much less honorable, since it requires one to knowingly deceive oneself in spite of the truth.

Since I find the notion of a Godless universe untenable, and since I too have rejected the idea of God as bookkeeper, I find myself staring at the handiwork of a God who is more like to an artist, an author, or a chef.

Good art is in itself extravagant and is very seldom efficient or practical.  Good stories take a long time to reach a satisfying ending, and in the middle there’s often room for a great deal of drama and heroism in the face of tragedy.  Good chocolate, is often more satisfying if there’s some bitter to offset the sweetness.  Even though, there are chapters and characters in the story that I wish had been left out, I trust that the story is reaching a climax.  The alternative is that there is no story, and all the tragedy and extravagance is senseless and pointless.

So there I stood in the snow.  Marveling at this extravagance, and feeling more comforted than bothered by it.  I’d far rather be a character in a grand story, a brush stroke in a work of art, or an ingredient in a wonderfully prepared meal, than a number in an accountant’s ledger.

“Earth’s crammed with heaven, And every common bush afire with God; But only he who sees takes off his shoes; The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries.”

-Elizabeth Barrett Browning

I’m back in the office after taking a few weeks holidays.  Trying to book concerts during the month leading up to Christmas was proving fruitless, so, under advice from a trusted friend, I decided to walk away from things for a bit and recharge.

Over Christmas, we took some time away to visit family, played lots of board games, went tobogganing, built a snow fort, and just generally had a good rest from things.

Upon returning home, I found an email from my friend Ken, who was moving soon, saying that they needed a new home for their tropical fish.  A few Tetras, an algae-eater, a Siamese Fighting Fish, and something called a Blue Dragon Goby.  Since our tank has seen a steady decline in population over the past few months, so I gladly agreed to take on these new refugees.

He showed up the next day with a cardboard box containing sizeable collection of plastic bags filled with all manner of aquatic life.  The Siamese Fighting Fish is one of the most stunning creatures I’ve ever seen.  Iridescent blue and crimson, it’s a majestic combination of beauty and violence.  It’s quickly become the most prized addition to the tank.  The Tetras are a plain, but pretty.  The algae-eater is ugly, but practical.  These, along with a few plants, were a welcome addition to the tank, and I was glad to accept them.

Then, Ken got a little quiet as he reached into the box to pull out the Goby.  He handed me the bag, carefully holding it at arms length with a look of apology.  He’d mentioned on the phone that is was an interesting fish with a lot of “character”.  And now, I saw exactly what he meant.  What he’d “forgotten” to mention on the phone was that it was also the ugliest thing a person could lay eyes on and still live.

The animal was more snake than fish.  Long and slithery, with beady eyes that would chill the warmest of souls.  My first instinct was, “Kill it”.

I’m not especially fond of snakelike things, and I have relatives that may never visit again, knowing it’s here.  As I looked at it, I told myself, “Wait ‘til he leaves, then flush it.”

The algae-eater I could tolerate.  It’s ugly, but at least it’s useful.  The Siamese fighting fish serves no real purpose, but at least it’s beautiful.  The goby is hideous, and serves no purpose.  So I quietly decided to send it to a better place.  But something stopped me.

I realized I was willing to end a creature’s life simply because I found it repulsive and because it had nothing to give me.  The Siamese Fighting Fish I would keep because, even though it served no purpose, it was beautiful.  The algae-eater I would keep because even though it was ugly, it was useful to me.  What I saw inside myself was something far uglier than a Blue Dragon Goby.

It made me realize that I often do the same thing with people.  I invest time and energy into people who captivate me, or who I perceive as useful to me in some way.  People who are neither beautiful nor useful are a distraction or an annoyance.  I tend to treat then as objects.

This becomes especially true during seasons when I feel that I have little to give.  Most of the time this goes unchecked, but for some reason it became crystal clear as I stared into the cold, beady eyes of the serpentine menace floating in a plastic bag, waiting to be released in either my fish tank or the sewer beneath my home.

The point is not the fish.  The point is that everything God has created has been endowed with a sense of dignity.  Not because it has value to us, necessarily, but because it has value to Him.  All of creation is God’s craftsmanship, and no artist likes to see their work defaced or devalued.  All of Creation, whether it’s people or plecostomi, has value and we will learn to value God’s works to the measure we value Him.  Or maybe it’s the other way around.  Maybe the only way to value Him is to value His creation.  It seems hypocritical to claim otherwise.

Almost paradoxically, it is the things we value least, which we often come to value the most, since it is only the ugly and the useless which can put us in touch with this reality.  So the Goby will stay.  It will be given a position of honor in the tank for teaching me a valuable lesson.  A lesson none of the other creatures could.  The humble has been exalted.  The low has been lifted high.  I think that’s the way God wants it.  And besides, I’m starting to like the little guy.

Keith

For a little over a year now, I’ve been doing music full time on my own.  I work alone. I tour alone. I perform alone. (Sometimes when I’ve been in the car a long time, I even have conversations on my own, but that’s another story.)  I don’t belong to a record label, so that means I do all my own booking and promotion.  As a result, it’s common for people to refer to me as an independent singer/songwriter.  I’ve even used that label to refer to myself from time to time.  For some reason, the title “Independent Artist” inspires fans to believe that the artist does their thing freely without being subject to pressure from marketing executives, and that somehow, their art is more pristine and genuine, which isn’t necessarily the case.  But even if that’s true, I think the title is misleading at best, and destructive to an artist’s place in the community at worst.

First of all, there’s no such thing as an independent human being.  All of us have parents, all of us belong to some kind of community, and all of us depend on others to survive.  As our society becomes more urbanized and specialized, we actually become more dependent upon others, even though we live under the growing illusion that somehow modern society has allowed us to become more independent.

For example, I don’t know a single person who grows their own food, at least not enough to survive on.  We don’t build our own homes or educate our own children.  Other people do that for us. (Ok, so some people build their own houses, but they rely on someone else to harvest the necessary materials for them.  Some people choose to educate their own children, but they usually rely on someone else to provide them with the curriculum.)  Anyways, my point in all of this is that it is a simple fact of human existence that we cannot survive alone.

Richard Wurmbrand wrote extensively about the 3 years he spent in solitary confinement under the communists in Romania.  For three years, the only time he saw another human being was when he was dragged from his cell and beaten.  He said that other inmates would regularly start screaming for no other reason than that this prolonged isolations began to rob them of their sanity.  Given time, isolation begins to strip away our humanity.  So, to consider yourself an independent anything is to delude yourself.  We are not independent.  We need others. We find health and wholeness in community.

This is the way it was intended from the beginning.  Some of the first words spoken by God to a human being, according to the Scriptures, were when He looked at Adam and said, “It is not good for the man to be alone…”  In fact, the Triune God, is the centerpiece of Christian theology, so that even God is both unity and community.  We were never meant to exist independent of others.  As God, Himself, has said, “It is not good…”.

The longer I do this the more keenly aware I become of my need for community.  I am deeply dependent on others.  I am dependent on churches to host concerts.  I am dependent on people to come to those concerts and buy CD’s.  I’m also deeply dependent on the people who go out of their way to encourage me. Sometimes, just like Moses, we need other people to come along and hold our arms up.

But it goes even further than that. We’re dependent on each other, this much is clear, but if we stop there, it can lead to nihilism and to a sense of entitlement. (I need you, so you have to help me.).  The Scriptures are also clear that each of us have been given talents and abilities to be stewards of, and those abilities are not our own, they’re given for the edification of the community.  In other words we are interdependent.  We need and we are needed.  This is far more than others simply being dependent on us.  It means we are responsible to meet the needs of others, according to the talents, gifts, and abilities we’ve been given.

Now, none of this is profound by any means, but it’s a reality that’s been helpful for me to come to terms with.  For one, it deepens my sense of gratitude toward someone who supports me in this role, whether they come to a show, or make a hefty donation toward my next album, or simply offer an encouraging word because I depend on them.  But, it also strengthens me and gives me courage to continue in this sometimes difficult ministry, because our interdependence means that my art is more than just a luxury, it’s a necessity.  If I have been given the ability to meet a need, then there must also be a corresponding need I’m responsible to meet.  So I can’t just quit when my needs aren’t being met, because my gifts are not my own.  Rather, I have a responsibility to others.  Not only am I in need, but I am needed.  And sometimes, our greatest need, is to be needed.

God’s Peace.

Keith Kitchen - Interdependent Singer/Songwriter

A few weeks ago, we celebrated the first anniversary of my new ministry of traveling and doing music full time.  When I ventured out to explore a new way of doing art, life, and ministry, I had no idea what it would be like. To tell you the truth, I thought I’d be pumping gas within six months.  But God has been good to us.  Many people have invited us into their homes and churches to play and to share and, truth be told, I feel like I’ve received more than I’ve given.

I’ve had a chance to make a lot of new friends.  I’ve driven thousands of miles, and crossed this beautiful country of ours.  I’ve been everywhere from Fernie, BC to Ottawa and I’ve had some wonderful encouragement along the way.  Last fall I was nominated for 3 Covenant Awards, and although that was tremendously gratifying for me, what’s been even more encouraging has been meeting people after a concert and hearing their stories.  It seems that my songs have become their songs.  One night, after playing a concert at a Lutheran Camp in Northern Saskatchewan, an older gentleman came up to me and said, “I really liked your songs, there, young man.  They’re good songs,… with good theology.  You know, us Lutherans like good theology.”  He patted me on the back and continued on his way.  That was far more encouraging than any award. (Incidentally, my producer, Roy Salmond, says that awards are, “pretty weird. Like cotton candy - no nutritional value, but they do taste sweet nonetheless. (As long as you know it ain’t steak)”

And now, with one year under my belt, I’m looking ahead to the future.  Sometimes I think this is the wrong time to do this.  The world is in an economic hurricane, and everyone’s trying to batten-down the hatches and wait out the storm.  Many artists, far more well-established than I am, are tightening their belts and downsizing.  Sometimes concerts are hard to book, and I wonder if we’ll make it another month.

But then I remember feeling the same way last year, when we were just starting-out.  Now, here I am.  A little older, a little wiser, a lot more at peace than I used to be.  I am a worrier by nature.  I come from a long line of worriers.  But this past year has taught me patience, and maybe… faith (Ironically, I’ve learned that it takes a lot more faith to be a musician than it did to be a pastor, but that’s another article).

All this came to a head for me, back about 5 months ago.  I’d hit a rough spot, and was wondering if it wasn’t time to pack it in.  I went to Calgary to investigate a ministry position with a local church there.  They needed a worship pastor and I needed (or thought I needed) a little more stability.  It’s a great church, and it would have been a great fit, except for the fact that I just didn’t feel right about taking the job.  One night I was lying in bed, praying about the whole situation, when I believe God spoke very clearly to me.

Now, I have to clarify here.  I don’t hear voices in my head.  I don’t assume every headache is some kind of demonic attack.  Nor do I assume every free parking spot is an act of divine intervention.  But, I have had a few rare moments in my life, when God has spoken to me.  Maybe 5 times…  Maybe.

That night, He said,”Keith…, what are you doing here?  Did you come here out of fear…, or out of faith?  My word says, “The righteous will live by faith.”.   At that moment, I knew that the situation wasn’t right.  I had to face my fears and go back home.

Over the past few months, we’ve seen God’s provision in some wonderful ways, but there’s still this nagging feeling like maybe next month will be the month we’ll have to sell all our furniture and eat peanut butter (except we can’t because my son is allergic).  Every day is a decision to live by faith rather than fear.  To keep pursuing our calling by faith, until faith shows us otherwise.  To do otherwise is to give in to fear.  Fear is the absence of Love, of Hope, and of Faith.  “The righteous will live by faith” (Habakkuk. 2:4).

I’m pleased to announce that I’ll be touring with Steve Larsen ( www.stevelarsenmusic.com ) for two weekends coming up in April.

Dates include:

Sat. April 18th - Victory Church, Lethbridge AB (Catch Keith again the following Sunday Morning)

Sun. April 19th - Community Baptist Church, Fernie BC

Fri. April 24th - Moose Jaw Alliance Church, Moose Jaw SK

Sun. April 26th - Trailview Alliance Church, Swift Current SK

Mon. April 27th - Westhill Park Baptist Church, Regina SK

All Shows begin at 7pm.  Admission: Free will Offering. 

Steve and I go way back, having played with many of the same musicians, back when we both lived in Regina.  He is a master guitar player and consummate performer.  His shows are energetic, and always sparkle with his quick wit, and sense of humor.

Hope to see you there!

This year the Canadian Gospel Music Association (CGMA) has nominated Keith for three different awards:

Folk/Roots Album of the Year-Broomtree

Folk/Roots Song of the Year - “Flame”

Keith has also been nominated for New Artist of the Year.

Keith’s album is available for purchase on this website, and on iTunes.

It’s a startling thing to find yourself in the middle of a dream, and then to come to the realization that you aren’t dreaming at all. Such has been the last month and a half of pursuing this music ministry full time. I never dreamed I’d be doing this. No, that’s not true… I ALWAYS dreamed I’d be doing this. I never BELIEVED my dream would actually become reality. But, lo and behold, here I am, doing it. Not wishing I were doing it, not hoping I’ll do it, not regretting that I didn’t do it. I’m doing it (or perhaps more accurately, it’s being done, and here I am in the middle of it).

It’s a humbling, and not altogether comfortable feeling to see your thoughts of what is possible effectively dwarfed in comparison to what is actually possible. It’s rather like being one of the disciples in the boat on the Sea of Galilee in the middle of a raging storm with Jesus sleeping in the back of the boat. I have no idea what their intention was in waking Jesus up. Perhaps they wanted Him to pray a blessing over them before they died. Perhaps they were angry at Him for displaying such peace in the midst of turmoil (I have been known to do this to people with more faith than I have in the midst of adversity), or maybe they just wanted Him to witness His immanent death along with the rest of them. In any case, what they got was far more than what they expected. I’m sure at that moment God had firmly placed a desire in their hearts that the storm would be miraculously calmed, but I doubt they believed it was possible because when Jesus stood up, and gave the storm a proper tongue-lashing they couldn’t believe what they were seeing. After Jesus’ rebuke, the storm effectively blushed, cowered, and then slinked-off to wherever humiliated storms go when they’ve been disciplined, and the disciples stood there in fear and awe (mostly fear) wondering who this was. This was Jesus. The carpenter. The rabbi. The miracle-worker. Their friend, of course, but now they saw Him as so much more. He was the One. The only one who could shatter their perceptions about what is believable with what’s possible. The One who can calm a storm with a word. And when they recognized him as the One who was able to transport them from the realm of belief to the realm of possibility, they came to the end of themselves and asked that fearful question, “Who is this…?”

I have been asking the same question lately. How is it that my family and I now find ourselves in the middle of what’s possible, only to realize our expectations for God’s provision were way to small. And, so it is with great reluctance that I must admit (along with a chorus of every awful Disney Movie ever made), that dreams do indeed come true.

Now, I had no intention of this post becoming another sappy cliche about daring to live out your dreams, or believing that anything is possible, but it seems to be true (On a side note, it’s interesting to me how a cliche becomes a cliche. Most cliche’s were at one time powerful, fresh statements of truth. It’s just that through overuse, or insensitive use, they have been robbed of their power. Such is the job of a writer. To take a truth that has become cliche, and to rephrase it in a way that breathes power back into it, all the while hoping that your work doesn’t eventually become cliche itself, Therein lies the rub. I digress.). The simple truth I am learning is that God places desires in our hearts to fulfill them, not to tease us. He doesn’t always fulfill the desire the way we imagine, and He may choose to withhold our desires from us until we developed the necessary character to be able to use His gifts responsibly, but His desire is to fulfill our desires, namely because He’s the one that gave us the desire in the first place.

That nagging desire burning a hole in your heart may just be there for a reason. Follow it…

k.

Keith will be touring in Alberta, July 17th -20th:

Lethbridge, 7:30pm July 17th @ Victory Church Lethbridge. Hwy 3, 1 mile East of Town. Tickets $10.

Sylvan Lake, 7:30pm July 18th @ Top O’ The Hill Golf Course. Hwy 20 North. Tickets $15.

Calgary, 7:30pm July 19th @ Rockyview Alliance Church. 6927 Rundlehorn Dr. Tickets $10.

St. Albert, 7:30pm July 20th @ St. Albert Alliance Church. R.R. 1. Tickets $10.

Hope to see you there!!!

Just a note to say that the song “What Could I Be” has been added to the rotation on CHVN-95.1 in Winnipeg, CFAQ-100.3 in Saskatoon, and CKVN-98.1 in Lethbridge.Let us know if you hear it on the air, or better yet, phone in and request it. 

Keith is heading out on tour in February. You can catch Keith in concert in the following cities:

February 7th - 7:30pm - Saskatoon, SK - Westgate Alliance Church

February 8th - 7:30pm - Regina, SK - Living Hope Alliance Church

February 9th - 7:00pm - Winnipeg, MB - The Bridge Church

February 10th - 7:30pm - Brandon, MB - Grand Valley Comm. Church

All tickets $10.00.

Hope to see you at a concert near you.

k